CHECK THIS OUT!!!!

WELCOME. WELCOME TO MY NEW COMPUTER. SHE (NO, NOT A HE) HAS NOT GOTTEN A NAME YET. I AM STILL THINKING THAT ONE OVER...
SO LETS DISCUSS MY ACTIONS FOR THE PREVIOUS 2 DAYS..THIS IS TUESDAY NIGHT, REALLY WEDNESDAY AT 1:45AM, MY HEALTH ALARM STARTED BEEPING..I REACHED FOR THE LIGHT, PUT IN ON AND FORGOT I LEFT THE THING FROM AROUND MY NECK IN THE BATHROOM. SO I GO AND GET IT. THEN THE PHONE RINGS, I KNEW IT WAS THE 911 OPERATOR."IS EVERYTHING ALRIGHT?" YES I SAY, I DONT KNOW WHY IT WENT OFF. BACK TO BED. AFTER ABOUT 30 MINUTES I HEARD A CRASH. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT? PUMPKIN HAS ALREADY CRAWLED UNDER THE BED. I AGAIN GET UP TO SEE WHAT IT WAS. THE CLOCK IN MY KITCHEN FELL OFF THE WALL. SLEEP AGAIN. THE NEXT MORNING (WED) MY CLEANING PEOPLE CAME AT 8:30. I WAS READING IN THE KITCHEN, GETTING READY TO GO TO LAKE WORTH ABOUT 45 MINUTES UP THE COAST. ANY HOW, ONE OF THE LADIES CALLED ME AND WAS YELLING WATER, WATER.. WHAT? MY WASHING MACHINE WAS FULL TO THE TOP AND RUNNING OVER..I DONT KNOW WHEN THAT STARTED, SO WE ALL STARTED TO SOAK IT UP. I CALLED MY SERVICE COMP. AND SHE SAID TO TURN OFF THE MAIN AND SHE WILL SEND A MAN BETWEEN 1-6. I CALL MY MAINTENANCE PEOPLE. OFFICE IS STILL CLOSED. I GET A GIRL AND SAID IT IS AN EMERGENCY. SHE SAID SHE WILL SEND A GUY TO CLOSE IT...GOODY. I SAID GOODBYE TO THE GIRLS AND LEFT THE HOUSE. I KNOW THE ROUTE VERY WELL. ON THIS DAY THEY WERE REPAIRING THE ROAD.(SAWGRASS EXPY) AND I MISSED MY TURN. TOLL $1.00. OK, I KNOW I HAVE TO TURN AROUND. (TOLL $1.00) I ASK THE TOLL TAKER WHICH ROAD TO THE FLORIDA TURNPIKE...ANOTHER $1.00..I FINALLY GOT TO MY FRIENDS HOME. MY FRIEND IS A GENIUS ON COMPUTERS. HE SET THIS ONE UP FOR ME AND TOOK THE STUFF OUT OF THE OLD ONE. (MY GREAT-NIECE IS GETTING IT) SHE IS 4 . LOL
SO I TOOK THEM TO LUNCH AND LEFT THERE AT ABOUT 3PM. I HAD A QUICK DINNER AND COLLAPSED IN MY LOUNGER.. AFTER ABOUT AND HOUR AND A HALF I DECIDED TO SET THIS UP..I HAVE NEVER SEEN SO MANY WIRES FOR A WIRELESS COMPUTER IN MY LIFE..I DID A GREAT JOB. CHECKING IT OUT...MY COMPUTER DOES NOT WANT TO TALK TO MY BROADBAND SYSTEM..I CALL BELL SOUTH/AT&T AND COMCAST. THE GUY CAME THIS AM..I LEFT OUT ONE DAMN LITTLE PLUG....AGHHH. NOW, I AM GOING OFF THIS THING..I HAVE BEEN ON IT ALL DAY. IT IS A VISTA SYSTEM AND IT IS VERY DIFFERENT FROM THE OLD WINDOWS PROGRAM..I GOTTA GET USED TO IT. IT EVEN HAS A WEB-CAM..THAT MEANS I CANNOT PLAY WITH IT NAKED!!!!!
SEE YA